Wait, what?
We live in a world with infinite differences – and every day we are exposed to content online that exploits our differences.
But what would happen if we put that same magnifying glass on the differences that unite us? Like food and friendship, for starters.
Two years ago, I returned to Chile from the US. After being away from my country for so long, I realized that certain things are not forgotten – in particular food and friends.
Since I’ve been working at Civity, I’ve discovered how civity tools can help me be more conscious of including others and more intentional about contributing to my community. I am thankful to have these tools in a world that needs connections across difference more and more.
Civity interactions are an antidote to the rise of technology that has led to the diminished quality of interpersonal relationships. I remember before social media, when walking through a neighborhood or public space was a journey between smiles and greetings between people. Today, most people walk with their eyes on screens or with headphones in their ears, making personal interaction extremely difficult.
But civity shows that it is possible to live in a highly developed world and a supportive, empathetic, and other-conscious society. It is not about demonizing technology, nor about stigmatizing the modernity in which we live; it is about adapting reality to the intrinsic social needs of people.
Since I began working at Civity, I have seen a positive change in my group of friends that has even impacted their families and wider social circles. Without thinking and without planning, my friends and I have been doing civity for quite some time.
Every week, my friends and I get together around a meal called “La Once” (the elevens) in Chile. “La Once” is something that happens between lunch and dinner. It is similar to tea time; only in Chile, it is about putting hot water on the table with a variety of hot drink options (or ice cold in summer), a large “Panera” (large container of fresh bread from the bakery), and many other ingredients.
“La Once” usually consists of catching up on how things are going between friends or family. “La Once” is a civity action.
Because my friends know that I work at Civity, they have always been interested in knowing what this special word “civity” involves. In one way or another, I have always made my friends part of my work, and over time they have adapted the word “civity” and put it into practice in their own lives.
A couple of months ago, we got together for “La Once” – or what in Chile we call “Tomar la Once” (to take eleven) – at my house. We had tea, coffee, apple pie, traditional Chilean bread (marraqueta), and delicious toppings. As we ate and caught up with our lives, one of my friends said, “Hey, we’re doing civity.” Stunned, I asked him why.
His response was wonderful.
“This same thing that we do now regularly, I have been practicing it with other acquaintances with whom we share the same passion for bicycles.”
It turns out, he began to hold weekly meetings around “La Once” modeled after civity practices, and these civity interactions are now part of a social action group that carries out bike ramp installations, vacant lot cleanup, and even free bicycle classes for children – integrating people from different economic groups and different nationalities. Here the differences do not matter; it only matters that you want to ride a bike!
The same thing has happened with the rest of my friends and their immediate communities.
Losing the fear of social contact helps us advance steadily in the construction of a more empathetic and supportive society, which can face the challenges that our modernity presents.
It is important to be aware that we need each other, that we are not islands – to get out of our minds the idea that large advertising campaigns, large technological investments, or million-dollar interventions are needed to build better societies. We can be the change we want in the world – and, no matter where in the world we are, there will always be food and friends – and opportunities to do civity.